Monday, December 08, 2008

Sweet Nothings

"You're going to have to cut your toe nails," I said.

We were lying in bed, going to sleep for the night.
"WHAT? I just cut them!" he balked.

"Every night you flex your foot and scrape your sharp, dagger-like toenails right up my shin," I told him.

"Oh, PLEASE," he said. "You do that to me too."

"I do not!" I insisted.

"Yes you do! Only you don't just innocently flex your foot, you extend your leg and purposefully reach out with it -- THEN you drag YOUR toenails up MY shin."

"I absolutely do not reach out and scratch you on purpose!"

He sighed.
"Is it so hard for you?" he said facetiously.

"It IS!" I insisted, then added, "but I love you anyway."

"You do?" he asked, smiling.

"Mmmm hmmm," I replied, drifting a bit.

He stuck his finger in his mouth and soaked it in spit.

Then he reached out and purposefully stuck it in my ear.

"Do you love me now?"

26 comments:

Merrily Down the Stream said...

Seriously, what's the matter with him!?!?!

flutter said...

but did he need to cut his nails? THAT is the question

Honeybell said...

I think our husbands are related.

mo.stoneskin said...

What a man!

Sorry, not sure if that was the right thing to say...

You guys are inspirational.

Actually, contrary to the flow, it is my missus who is the guilty party when it comes to "dragging" toe nails like that.

Jackie said...

HAHAHHA! This is my husband and me except he uses his horribly scary cracked heels. He does it to get a reaction out of me because I scream in pain and say you almost severed my leg off! or Get your cheese grater foot off of me! But I get him back... he calls me "Dagger Toes." Hehe.

Vodka Mom said...

that just made me laugh....

men NEVER grow up, do they?

Mrs. Schmitty said...

Now, that's something I would have done to Mr. Schmitty.

Patience said...

Eeeewwwww! Wet Willy!!!

Mad(ish) Woman said...

I'm wondering if The Man and your man are the same. This sounds like a conversation that happened in my house last weekend (although, admittedly, I was the wet willy giver - but only because he threatened me with it!)

WILLIAM said...

I love wet willies

Bogart in P Towne said...

That is one brave dude!

IdleMindOfBeth said...

Why oh WHY do they need to do that?

ARGH!

Patois said...

I bet you love him even more!

Sugarplum's Mom said...

Ahh.... true love

furiousBall said...

romeo wet-willied juliet too

Dory said...

I believe this exact same exchange has occurred in OUR bed.

Dory

mamatulip said...

I JUST asked Dave to cut his fucking daggers - I mean toenails - this week.

Karly said...

Ah, yes. The Wet Willy. My children have known how to do that since they were old enough to crawl into bed with Daddy and wake him up. He loves me for teaching them that. :)

Miss Ash said...

*chuckle*

That sounds like my guy & I!!

Little Nut Tree said...

giggle


ps - my letters for leaving my comment are bummen. I don't know why this make me laugh ... but it does.

Sorry :)

movin' down the road said...

next time, give him a big wedgie

Jenna Consolo said...

Ewwww! A wet willy! YUCK! I hate those!

Wendy said...

Ha! We (or maybe just I?) always say "I love you ANYWAY!" Ah, marriage.

Hetha said...

I'd take a wet willy over a dutch oven any day! Haha!

Penny said...

You two are adorable. Truly. I Love it. :)

Shannon said...

My husband has dagger toes, too! And he gave them to my daughter. It's awful - either he's slicing my shins, or she's spearing me in the ribs. The comments on this one, btw, made me laugh almost as much as the post.