Friday, August 24, 2007

Just Desserts - So Tasty!

In college I worked as a concert promoter.

I worked for a student run organization that brought huge concerts to the campus arena in order to fund lesser known acts at the smaller venues.

The student group structure included: 2 senior leaders who booked the bands; 10 managers who handled advertising, hospitality, and other logistics; and a team of 100 student volunteers who provided stage management, ushering and other labor during the events.

In 1987, I was one of the 10 managers along with a woman named...I'll call her "Patty" here, though that is not her real name.

I was not nice to Patty. I was MEAN to Patty.

Because I was the bossy ring-leader type, my friends were also mean to Patty.

As I recall, the reason I didn’t like her was that at a managers meeting she made, what seemed to me, a disdainful remark about someone and likened the person to a garbage collector.

I remember feeling offended, thinking that she believed she was somehow better than people who collected garbage for a living.

How dare she degrade garbage collectors!

Why would she think being a garbage collector was dishonorable or distasteful?

OH, MY RIGHTEOUS INDIGNATION!!

In honor of hardworking garbage collectors everywhere, I decided that, from that point forward, I would treat Patty like garbage.

[What a genius.]

Oh, how I could have benefited from a teensy, weensy bit of maturity.

Did I take Patty aside after the meeting to clarify my understanding of her comment? No.

Did I tell her how her comment made me feel and ask her if she meant it that way? No.

Did I talk with her about it at all, ever? No. No. No.

Fast forward nearly twenty years to... (stay with me, this is a rough transition)...

...Seth and Ryan, two Fox Network hotties from the show The O.C.


Now JUDGE if you want, but I was enslaved to the boxed DVD set of the first season of The O.C.

It was like narcotic candy with a great soundtrack.

The soundtrack was so great, in fact, that when the mixed C.D. compilations were released they were among the best selling compilation CD’s ever sold on iTunes.

I purchased several of them myself.

A few months later I got an e-mail from my friend Sophia who had been one of the other student organization managers with Patty and me.

Sophia & I, late 1980's



Sophia's e-mail told me to look at a particular page of Elle Magazine next time I passed a newsstand.

The Elle feature was about Patty... and her much lauded work... as a music supervisor... for The O.C.

Nice.

I blew my chance to get an up close glimpse of the eye candy twenty years ago (when these actors were babies.)

Earlier this week I randomly found Patty on one of those professional networking Internet sites.

I wrote her a long note confessing, apologizing and praising her work.

To her credit, she was gracious in return (despite the fact that I always was, and still am, an incredible butthead.)

68 comments:

Mamalicious said...

Okay, I got nothing on the whole O.C. thing. But that photo-nice! Very Robert Palmerish.

moosh in indy. said...

WHOOPS.
Eh, one of my jerky exes will be the next Matt Lauer. It's cool. I have friends like you and a husband like Cody.
Patty's loss.

kristen said...

You never know, right? I'm pretty sure I spent a lot of years jumping to conclusions. Ugh.

Shannon said...

See, if you were nice to her, you could've gotten a free box set of the OC soundtrack!

God, you had nice hair. Mine was huge. I was such a friggin Jersey Girl in the late 80's.

Sunshine said...

Curses to the humble pie!!

Glad you came around, feels good to set things straight.

Mary Alice said...

Blech. Crow. Nasty bird.

mcewen said...

We all make mistakes, big and little, the important thing is to recognise them and make amends - you're off the hook dearie.
Cheers

Marmite Breath said...

Oh.My.God.

You look RIDICULOUSLY HOT!!!!

I'm starting to rethink my whole orientation here, Jess.

Hetha said...

I agree with marmite breath, you were one hot chick in a time when most of us were rockin' the dorkiest looks of our lives! Nice!

CroutonBoy said...

Although I cannot condone your love of The O.C., I should high-five you for being a good person and reaching out to Patty. Well-played.

BTW, were you guys trying out for a Human League video in the 80's?

Queeny said...

You live and you learn. At least you've seen the error of your ways. Besides, isn't crow high in fiber?

3carnations said...

I'm impressed that you contacted her. I have been tempted to contact a girl I picked on in Junior High...but I'm a wuss like that, so I won't. Plus the fact that I live 15 hours away, haven't spoken to the girl in over a decade...I don't want to be her friend by any means. I just feel sorry.

hello insomnia said...

I kind of bypassed the whole O.C. worship. I don't even want to think about all the people I have been mean to because they are probably all successful and hating me now.

Catherine said...

That's the kid from Gilmore Girls! Should I be watching the OC? Tell me now, I'm trying to plan my fall TIVOing.

Fidget said...

Shielding myself from the talk of the OC the meat of the post indicates that karma kicked you in the buns. Karma never forgets but thankfully you were smart and atoned. I know there are a lot of people I wrong and perhaps I will stumble across them and be able to apologize. There are a few against whom I still hold petty grudges. The picture? hee! tres 80s!!!

Mimi aka pz5wjj said...

Pardon me while I wipe the drool from my chin...

Now, what were you saying?

Amy said...

Good for you for making amends! It takes a large gulp of pride to be able to do that.

jen said...

i wonder if she thinks you are kissing up to her now in the hopes of a meet and greet?

dude. kidding. i think we all have things like this we can make amends for. good for you for doing it.

Adorable said...

That is really great that you sent her an e-mail. I have to admit, that so rarely happens in life!

Blog Antagonist said...

Ah well. Eating a little crow never hurt anybody. I oughta know. They should really contrive something to keep people out of the general population until about the age of 30 or so. We are such dimwits up to that point.

~JJ! said...

Yeah, the OC, could live without it and it's music.

But good for you for seeking and receiving closure...I applaud you...

(Clapping loudly)

~JJ! said...

Oh!!!! And that picture. I love it.

Jenifer said...

You look like a doll in that photo! I think an old Mac in the background, my university had a few of those too.

As for your penance I am not very good at admitting my wrongs, good for you to make amends.

flutter said...

You are too funny. But, you know, I don't think life is life, unless we are a total jerk for at leat 2 years.

kittenpie said...

I keep meaning to post about the one person I think I was an uncalled-for jerk to long ago, too. It's nice that you got a chance to apologize - it must feel nice to close that little drawer of guilt.

L.A. Daddy said...

The Moral: Be careful how you treat people on the way up because they could be giving you great swag and introducing you to hotties 20 years later.

Great pic of you and Sophia. Weren't you two in an OMD video? :)

Above Average Joe said...

Music Supervisor for The O.C. or author of a hip mommy blog that gets hundreds of responses weekly.

I'd rather be the blogger!

Alpha DogMa said...

OHMYDOG! I can't believe you emailed an apology. That's very big of you - I owe about a dozen of these to people in my youth...erm, and a few in my unyouth.

I won't let myself watch the OC or even allow my eyes to linger too long on that photo. It would be unseemly for I am an Old Crone.

carrie said...

Love that picture - Oh, the righteous indignation! :)

Oh well, you win some . . .

zellmer said...

OMG, love the 80s Sprockets turtle necks. I had the exact same hairdo and over-sized earring fetish. Now I'm reminiscing about my neon-yellow, superwide belt that I wore OVER my untucked shirt that was long enough to cover my ass, which was spandexed in stirrup pants.

Thanks for the chuckle.

Jonathon Morgan said...

Well...at least NOW you're capable of acting like grown-ups. ;) I'm hoping that by moving to a different country I can safely avoid all the people I was mean to in high school and/or college. Somehow I figure that's only a temporary decision...

JayJenny said...

OMG, I loved The OC! That's awesome!!

Jennifer aka Binky Bitch said...

You are a bigger person than I! Good for you!

And how cute are you back in the 1990's! Still cute now, by the way!

zdoodlebub said...

You rock to take the time to make amends. My list is long, starting with the boy whose straw cowboy hat I stomped on in fourth grade.

And my most recent "narcotic candy with a great soundtrack?" Hidden Palms. Two hizott little boyz on that show! And the mofos cancelled it! Blargh!

Jen M. said...

Okay, the fact that you are willing to eat crow 20 years after the fact says you're all right in my book!

THAT had to be a hard dish to swallow!

LOVE the computer in the background. Go DOS.

Selfmademom said...

My husband always tells me to be nice because you never know who knows who. But it's so hard being nice sometimes. Hilarious turn of events, though.

mothergoosemouse said...

No matter what does or doesn't come out of it, making amends is a good thing. I just usually need a glass or two of wine in order to do it.

Matt Bell said...

Great picture of you and Soph!

mamatulip said...

It just goes to show that you never do know where we'll all end up, do we?

Paige said...

That pic is straight out of the movie "Heathers" dude. Totally awesome to the max!

You're a good person, J-money, and this post just proves it.

beta mom said...

Okay, do you know what I found most depressing about the whole story?

When we (that's the royal "we" referring to any 80s chick) were running around being snotty to people/nice to people etc etc....those cute boys from the OC were running around in diapers.

notfearingchange said...

You who read my blog and understand me posting about the OC for weeks straight this summer, will understand my comment when i say

....YOU DID WHAT??!!!

*thumping head on desk*

*sniff sniff*

Oh wait...that's me being self-indulgent...whatever...

I will take this lesson with much credence - ALWAYS BE NICE.

But I'm glad to see that you were very adult to reach her! You are a great role model.

KC said...

Love that picture. And whatever, you didn't confirm that she was an asshole at the time but it was a pretty good inference based on her comments.

Lori at Spinning Yellow said...

This was great and I am sure I wouldn't have been brave enough to fess up. Good for you. And the picture, perfect!

Fairly Odd Mother said...

Wowee, I can't believe you contacted her! That does take some guts, woman!

I know nothing about the O.C. but, then again, I didn't look nothing like that in college either!

Nancy said...

eh, we have all done things like that at one point or another, Patty has too.

I try to tell my kids the choices they make today will have to be answered to later ... good or bad.

Or ... careful who's ass you kick today, you may have to kiss it tomorrow.

Hey ... did she have anything to do with the idea for the "Mean Girls" movie? LOL J/K

Haley-O said...

Love that glam photo of you two! Really great post. Strangely (bad-TV lover than I am....) I never got into the OC....

Lawyer Mama said...

LOVE the photo.

It was awfully mature of you to write her and apologize. I don't know I would have had the guts to do that.

Ponygirl said...

Ha ha ha, you effin dork. Nice "how cool am I" face, and nice country accents in the background. How long did you spend stenciling that apartment anyway? Did those curtains end up in the GARBAGE? Who COLLECTED those CURTAINS? Ha ha ha. Uh oh. I need to check myself. I'm so mean. I LOVE YOU!

canape said...

I wonder if she even thought about it anymore until she heard from you. Did she say?

Cathy said...

How, how, did you make it through the late 80s without succumbing to the hideous spiral perm craze? (my hair in 1987? ack. and don't get me started on the big pouf-bang. or the way in which I held out the sides of my hair and sprayed just in front of the ears, before using a hair dryer. ugh.)

I have a Patty from college. Haven't had the nerve to contact her, however. Good for you!

notfearingchange said...

btw OTJ...if you need a good station to tune into for great music www.novaplanet.com
i think you will enjoy
now do i post my photos from my depeche mode era?

Mrs. Mustard said...

OH! That smarts!
I am also a butthead, but so far none of it has bitten me in the ass quite as badly.

Ruth Dynamite said...

Ah, but what if you were right all along? Would you overlook her arrogance just to meet some young hotsies? (don't answer that)

Mama Zen said...

Very big of you to email her and apologize!

mrsmogul said...

Hehe I used to be a club party promoter. WHOA those were the days!! I used to love the OC the first two seasons but then it got all weird for me!

liv said...

but, see how you came right around and told her how much you appreciated her work? oh, the sweetness!

Loralee Choate said...

I used to manage concerts as well, but they were with symphonies, opera companies and choral groups.

My closest incounter to a "Hot Young Thing" was Charlotte Church.

:S

Loralee Choate said...

Sigh. I did the "E and I" thing again.

ENCOUNTER.

I did the same thing with the National ENQUIRER when they bought photos off my blog. I kept typing "Inquirer".

Not so great for price negotiation!

Damselfly said...

Well, what if your being mean to her made her work harder? And that got her where she is today? ;)

Aliki2006 said...

Okay, now I'm going to have to go back and watch the OC, since I've never seen and now feel like I've really missed something!

momomax said...

I can't tell if you loving the OC is more entertaining than your picture. Strangley, we looked a little bit alike back then...I guess makeup can homogenize more than just skin tone.

Mrs. Chicky said...

Eating crow kinda sucks sometimes. But at least you have pretty pictures of hawt boys to keep you happy.

blooming desertpea said...

I think we've all been through times of "not being nice" to people at that age. After all, one can't expect to be wise already in their twens. What would we do in the next coming century? (Btw. who wants to live that long anyway :))

Moobs said...

I am so glad that this worked out for you. I have been doing the same kind of thing. I have been using the internet to contact people I was a dick to and apologising. Two thing have struck me. people are very forgiving of our wrongdoing and we are the least forgiving. I have been holdingmyself to account for this stuff, in some cases, for upwards of 20 years.

mrs incredible said...

what? letting go of your rage and anger? what will fuel your blog? I'm kidding, I am actually talking about myself. I am not woman enough to admit the wrongness in my wrongness, so I bow to you.

allrileyedup said...

Well, you live and learn. And what would you really have done if you met the boys (stress on the "boys")?

Alex Elliot said...

I'm impressed that you emailed her! I'm not sure if I could have done that.