Thursday, July 12, 2007

And That's Not All It Can Do, Sister!

"I WANNA POTTY TEAT!"

The Rooster recently discovered that using the potty results in sugar delivery in the form of a potty treat.

Girlfriend is suddenly ALL ABOUT THE POTTY.

[My little Pavlovian.]


Right out of the box she has demonstrated an expertise at rationing her pee.

She asks to use the potty, deposits one tablespoon of liquid in it and demands a potty treat.

[Over and over all day long.]


Make no mistake, I'm not complaining.

My not-yet-two-year-old girl has decided to potty train herself?

Here's a whole freaking bag of candy, Roo.


Potty training Rooster hadn't yet occurred to K and I, but we're excited.

There is much yelling,


"Hurray! You made pee pee on the potty!!"

She is very proud.

[And WAY sugared up.]


Yesterday she ran out to the hall and stood in front of the full length mirror admiring.

She swayed from side to side and started singing.

Her dance became increasingly animated and her voice more robust as she established a level of confidence in her chorus.

With arms raised and waving in the air, her voice rang out with these lyrics,

"MY GYNA!
MY GYNA!
PEE COMES OUT MY GYNA!"

With song and dance she celebrated her equipment all morning.

Oh, the awesomeness of the gyna!



P.S. -- What better place than a post about awesome vaginas to make sure you know that Crank Mama (remember - the woman with the HOTNESS?) moved her blog here. Check it out!

89 comments:

Redsy (formerly CrankMama) said...

Oh the awesome vagina. I'm honored to be linked here.

Rachael

Twisted Cinderella said...

Too funny! I love that she is making this easy on you!

Julie Pippert said...

WTG on the training!

And LOL about her strategy to maximize treat distribution. Clever girl.

Aliki2006 said...

That's a girl who knows how to make the system work for her...way to go!

Jim said...

I see a new blog in the future-

ohthegyna.blogspot.com

Marine Wife said...

You gotta strike while the iron is hot! We missed our window with Thing 2 and she is only now potty training a few months after her 3rd birthday. In my defense, I missed that window b/c we had a guests coming for a week (while we lived overseas) and I knew we'd be on the go a lot -- not optimum potty training time.

Way to go, Roo!

mark said...

That's hilarious. I stopped by because I thought of you when I saw this.

Mrs. Schmitty said...

I'm jealous! R. is 3 and it is now a battle of the wills to get her to use the potty. She'll sit in it all day, she just doesn't care!

Biddy said...

tehehehe i love the song! and serious props on the potty training.

somehow, i don't think she'll do the same dance when she gets her first period...

~JJ! said...

Yet, another reason I need to come with my daughter and live with you...I'm jealous.

FENICLE said...

WOO HOO!!!! Isn't it wonderful when they learn they have control...except when they use it in their favor.

WILLIAM said...

I think maybe Avril Lavigne may be eyeing up those lyrics. You better copy right them.

Although it sounds more like a Black Eyed Peas song.

Gingers Mom said...

I found my girl much easier to train. I didn't get any fancy songs about the gyna though. I'd teach my boys an awesome song about their penis....but God knows a man doesn't need another way to celebrate THEIR parts.

JoeinVegas said...

Is she imitating somebody? Now, you don't dance around the house singing similar songs, do you?

Wendi Aarons said...

I pee all day too, but nobody gives me sugar for it. Just cranberry juice & Motrin.

Natsthename said...

Hey, I pottied this morning. Where's all the to-do about that?

Congratulations on the big step forward to you and The Rooster!

ewe are here said...

Oh gawd, that is too funny.

MF is all about the M&Ms when he uses the potty.

But I'm a little relieved we're not being treated to loud renditions of 'The penis! The penis! My wee comes out of the penis!' Although I suppose that could be next... hmmmm.

furiousBall said...

I made up a song for my kids about dropping the deuce on the potty. The bad part is I am called into the bathroom to put on command performances all the time while they drop deuces. Hard to sing whilst in a fog of poo.

kgirl said...

Too funny. Bee has also started tt herself, before it really occured to us to do it. Yesterday she peed a tiny bit in the potty, then stood up, leaned over the couch and yelled at her dad, 'clean my bum!'
It was a very funny site.

mcewen said...

I'll be watching the popular music charts as that refrains soars.
Cheers

wordgirl said...

Finally! So tired of the universal worship of the penis in the country!

NotSoSage said...

Calling Eve Ensler now to get Roo a spot in the show.

Augs Casa said...

my kingdom for my 3 year old boy to be potty trained!

Heather said...

That is so awesome. Gotta love a kid who does your job for ya :)

Anonymous said...

Tell Ruby Grandma Seattle is so proud of her. Love the song and the self admiration. She is a hoot. Can she come live with me ;-) - After you finish the toilet training of course ;-) I did enough diaper duty when last I saw her.

Lawyer Mama said...

Great song! LOL!

Above Average Joe said...

LA LA LA LA LA LA!!!!!
It can't hear you say those words.
LA LA LA LA LA LA!!!!!

moosh in indy. said...

How did she know MY song?

QT said...

LOL! I think I may use that the next time I want to "fire" a client...

KC said...

Oh boy, this sounds familiar. She's getting ready, get prepared...when the time is right and they're psyched about, it is a BREEZE.

Jackal said...

Too cute !

Mama's Moon said...

'Yay' for the gyna!! Lately I've been celebrating the 'gyna' too, especially since Hubby and I have the house to ourselves for at least another week!!! Talk about what YOU would do to a park ranger! rrrowwwrr!

Tracysan said...

Fantastic! Sounds like it's time to get out the video camera for future blackmail tape. All I can think of now is a little crystal candy dish sitting on a toilet with a delicately engraved card that reads "potty teats." Thanks for the mental image...it cracks me up!

carrie said...

Rooster's Monologue.

Carrie

Jenn said...

Potty Treats?

Absolutely freaking brilliant.

God, I love you.

Patience said...

That little girl is alllllll wo-man!!

ali said...

we're kinda going through the same thing around here...

except isabella calls it My SHINA! and she always seems to yell it!

BlondeMomBlog (Jamie) said...

Potty teat...I can't get that outta my mind!!!

Way to work the potty teat Roo!

Christina_the_wench said...

Hey candy beats a gold star on a chart ANY day. Good for Roo and pass the Tootsie rolls. I just got back from the john but I ain't dancing for you. No way.

miss bliss said...

We actually just bought a potty seat today (my mother-in-law offered the one my husband had been trained on, but we passed).

And, glad there are others using "vagina". We try, but it makes me feel so damn uncomfortable.

Queen Heather said...

Gyna's are awesome, I agree!

Hol&J said...

Way to go Roo!
You get props for the potty training, and figuring out how to work the system.

I'm lovin that song too! Strangely enough I found myself humming along.

We all need songs like that.

CamiKaos said...

Gynas are so awesome.

also, I love that I am not the only one in the big bloggy world that lives in a musical...

flutter said...

Oh Roo! Your gyna is a magical pee bag! Here's some candy!

Your kids kill me, Jess

Little Monkies said...

You are in so much trouble with that little smartie...apples to trees, as my husband's family says... ;)

Cathy said...

Wish I'd felt as celebratory about the Gyna last month as I followed the all-too-familiar instructions to "slide down just a little more."

Congrats on the potty training!

slouching mom said...

Oh I love her song. I really do!

S said...

LMAO!

Alpha DogMa said...

Despite having told DrKnow that I pee out of my vulva, he insists I pee out of my "big hairy girl penis."
Need to get the lock on the bathroom door fixed ASAP/

WILLIAM said...

I came back...just you know to see if you updated and I read the the first line again as Party Tits. Which I found funny.

Jenifer said...

Self-training? I want that model next time.

Omaha Mama said...

Sounds like the perfect chant for a conga line.

tulipmom said...

I was thinking the same thing about finding a small part for her in "The Vagina Monologues." Way to go Roo!

cronznet said...

LOL! Our kiddo yells for his "Poop Chocolate!" after each success. Can't wait for the day he hollers this in a restaurant...

mommiebear2 said...

OMG - That is great! Neither of mine did any singing and dancing for potty time, I am so jealous!

Annie said...

I wish you all the very best as you embark on this most horrible and frustrating of parenting tasks lol! At least that is my (ongoing) experience! It's no wonder I like a wee beer of an evening :)

notfearingchange said...

Now can you switch the sugar to green beans?
;0P

Jennifer aka Binky Bitch said...

I may sing that the next time I go potty. That is, if I ever get to go by myself.

Lisa Fine/Kelly Kelly said...

high time it got a theme song! that is so cute, and way to go, Roo!

Lisa

something blue said...

That is awesome! She might be a future songwriter.

It's probably a good thing that she wasn't singing "My Gyna, My Gyna gets me candy! Weeee"

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

smiles!!

Paige said...

Yeah, halfway through our trip back home, our little potty trainer started screaming for big girl panties.

Screaming.

Oh, the joys indeed.

painted maypole said...

Love the song! Too, too funny!

theotherbear said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
That is beautiful.

Lisa Milton said...

Oh glorious equipment - gotta love it.

My kids had a musical potty. They would pee just enough to be rewarded by some awful tinny music. We'd pour the droplets out and I would madly clean it (turn off the music) so we could through it again.

Good job Roo.

liv said...

I'm actually wondering how many of us were sitting and reading this post and imagining a tune to Roo's little ditty! I know I've got mine.

How proud are you? I'd love it if Peep would get off her butt and learn to tee tee on her own.

Shauna said...

I think some pee came out of my gyna I was laughing so hard!

Pgoodness said...

She is so awesome!!!

Mrs. Chicky said...

Ah, yes, the Gyna. It's one thing to enjoy the power of the Gyna and use it wisely (young Skywalker) - as Roo seems to be doing - but if she decides to go all Britney it will be time to step in.

urban-urchin said...

I am really jealous. My son has pee'd on the potty twice and to suggest to him that he should use it results in a No uttered in such a fashion you think I'd said pedophiles are really good people to work with kids. Instead he feels it's more appropriate to pee whereever he is standing- pantless- on top of the changing table. On the back deck. On the dog. Sigh. I am at my wits end with this potty training nonsense. Your Roo and her GYNA song are pretty damn funny.

Fidget said...

I loves me a good potty song and one that gives props to the all mighty gyna is even better!

jen said...

here's to awesome vaginas everywhere.

Stepping Over the Junk said...

"celebrated her equipment" HHAAAAAA!!! I can almost hear a little girl singing this! Awesome description of the dance.

shauna said...

Watch that girl. She's a future lyricist--certain to reach "I-like-big-butts-and-I-cannot-lie" fame. She's got to be a laugh a day--and could potty training be more joyful?!

the parents zone said...

LMAO..... Oh god she is clever girl and future artist...

karrie said...

You work it, Roo!

Bag of M&Ms right back atcha.

Mrs. Chicken said...

I have to hand it to you, you genius woman. You got gyna and teat in one post.

I'm forcing Mr. Chicken to get a job in Atlanta. I want to be your friend and drink coffee and tequila with you and K.

Shrink Wrapped Scream said...

Ha! Just wait and see how happy she'll make you when she's a teenager (from one who knows).

Helena sent me over, I'm glad she did!

Momish said...

Way to go Rooster! Love her new song!

(The title of this post is both perfect and hysterical! You kill me!)

Liam's Mom - Gina said...

Kudos to all!

Y said...

In my house, the lyrics would be "pee comes out my PACHINA!"

Long live the Gyna Pachina!

The Expatriate Chef said...

We've been at the training on and off since 18 months. Lately, she's discovered that she can postpone bedtime by making no less than five trips to potty in an hour. This rationing thing is an art form.

Cherann said...

I hope you save this post and let rooster read it when she's older.

It's possible that you can use it as blackmail when she's a teenager. You can threaten to mention it to her boyfriend if she doesn't clean up her room...

Karen Forest said...

Love the "gyna" and here miss L only knows it as a "pee pee". Even at that we haven't had any impromptu songs about it. We have, however, had songs sung to us by her while she was naked shaking her bootay and telling us to "spank it"...... Should I be worried?

Nah, I don't think so.

That Rooster, she is a cute one and so much fun too.

David said...

I wish my almost 3 year old were so exited about potty training! Is the secret teaching her the V word?

aimee / greeblemonkey said...

all bow down to a sugared up girl enamoured with her gyna.

Fairly Odd Mother said...

Why haven't I thought about the candy bride? It might just work here too.

Yeah for the gyna!

Lotta said...

We started with M&M's. One for pee, two for poo. And I admire your daughter's ability to stop and hold her pee stream. I lost that talent oh so long ago...

Flawed & Disorderly said...

Your children are insanely smart. I can't believe you could even understand what she was singing at that age, much less that she knows the word "vagina." Makes me feel inferior. We taught our kids that the proper terms were "koochie" and "hootiss." =)