Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Dance Monkey Dance!

If we stay out too long for a morning activity then the drive home is dangerous.

K and I know from experience that 15 minutes of sleep in the car can cancel out the afternoon nap.

This can't happen.

There MUST be an afternoon nap, G.

If the children appear even slightly drowsy in the car at this time of day whichever parent is not driving The Car of Joy morphs into a performing monkey -- singing, seat dancing, tickling feet and knees -- doing whatever it takes - (((WHATEVER IT TAKES!!!!!))) - to keep the children awake until we can get them home and in their beds.

On the way home from the Church of the Zoo last Sunday morning I was the monkey.

I was doing an elaborate cymbal clapping and singing routine entitled "Poop in Yer Pants" when The Mayor interrupted me.

"Mommy, I don't have a POOP in my pants. I've got COCONUTS."

Oh, the Y chromosome.

65 comments:

WILLIAM said...

I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts....


I am so with you on the "anything to prevent the canceling of the nap."

ewe are here said...

boys are funny.

We'll still take the sleep in the car right now. I'm sure that will be changing soon with the bigger boy... ;-)

Patience said...

COCONUTS!!! HAHAHA!

(What happens when there is poop and coconuts?!?)

Robin said...

The Mayor is learning to exaggerate early.

Becky said...

ROTFLMAO!! Oh, to be a fly on the wall... I think I would "poop in my pants" just from laughing so hard!

QueenieBadd said...

I totally know what you mean-I've almost gotten into accidents because I'm so busy yelling whatever child's name over and over to keep them awake, and looking in the rearview mirror, that I totally forget to look in front of me.

And what about the "fall asleep in the car at 5" thing? That will kill bedtime.

Big Daddy and I are actually masters at the car nap-we know every back road, and drive through, in the county from doing the drive around nap.

Chag said...

Ugh. I know the feeling. My kids become narcoleptic after fifteen minutes in the car. And like you, I hate missing the afternoon naps as well. So I'm constantly reaching behind my seat and tickling them, blaring the radio, or asking if they just saw the nonexistent puppy by the side of the road.

Rachel said...

Ha! Yes, I know what you mean. I always try to keep my daughter awake in the car in the morning, lest we not get an afternoon nap. I take off her shoes, sing, roll down the windows. A nap at the wrong time can ruin the whole day.

venessa said...

Coconuts! My nephew can't get enough of calling his parts "balls." All the time and everywhere. Yeah, good times.

A calls it a peanut. (She hears what she wants to hear, I guess.) As in, "I wish I had a peanut so I could pee standing up."

MamaLee said...

My son calls it a "stinky meatball."

And I do the monkey dance sometimes, too!

shaz said...

I didn't realize this was a common occurance... I thought it was only my kids that could sleep for 5 mins in the car and be completely 'unsleepy' at nap time! what's with that???

QT said...

I can't even post a comment anymore after details of the Mayor's outbursts. They all say the same thing ~

I LOVE THE MAYOR!!!

Jackie said...

ha, ha - if you could be a fly on the wall at my house you would often hear me telling the kids "I am not your trained monkey..." I doubt that I'm convincing anyone though...sigh... ;-)

Marmite Breath said...

I used to yell, "OMG! Robots!" and that would wake Tom up.

Of course, he was only trying to sleep with grapes in his underwear, not coconuts.

TSM-terrifically superiorily mediocre said...

And for some inexplicable reason, I am now singing "I've Got a Lov-e-ly Bunch of Coconuts" (dee-da-lee-dee)

DraMa said...

Oh, the hilarity.

Oh, the sameness of our lives!

I have to do all I can to keep my boys awake in the car sometimes too!! And it's REALLY hard when I'm the only adult in the car!

Jennifer said...

One must protect the afternoon nap! Whatever it takes!

coconuts! ha, ha!

SciFi Dad said...

If our kid slept for more than fifteen minutes at a shot (excluding nighttime, of course), in car or in bed, I'd be jumping for joy.

Woman with kids said...

He has a well developed sense of male pride...

Kevin Charnas said...

Coconuts, a banana and poor Dana with the shitty job.


p.s. Can I tell you that DAILY you were quoted in Paris with us? Seriously. One of us would spontaneously burst out without warning, yelling, "NO FRANCY!" And then we'd both be reduced to cackles. Could you feel our hearts thinking of you?

Julie Pippert said...

LOL!

But I know that "keep helplessly drowsy child awake" thing well. Sometimes things you learn in college at frat parties comes in handy. ;)

Above Average Joe said...

We have the same problem. But sometimes it's Mrs. Joe or myself that MUST have an afternoon nap.

The Queen Mama said...

"Church of the Zoo." Funny. Have attended that one a few times myself, as we often go to Mass on Saturday evening.

One scary thought about Church of the Zoo. Instead of getting sprinkled with Holy Water, you get sprinkled with...eeeeuuuuuu.

The only thing worse than being the designated monkey dancer is if you're solo with the kids, and must somehow monkey-dance and drive. Let me know if you figure that one out. I'm not that coordinated.

NotSoSage said...

Wow, bragging already? And to his Mommy, no less. You've got to hand it to him, then, he DOES have coconuts.

Oh, and yes, ever imagine what your 15 year-old self would have said about you if you'd driven past her in the car? Eye-rolling and denial would abound.

Heather said...

coconuts! Too funny!

allrileyedup said...

I have learned that if my daughter falls asleep in the car, then the nap will not happen, but I have to take my son out in the car in order to jumpstart the nap. It's a tricky line, knowing when to do the drive...

S. said...

LOL!

slouching mom said...

Hah! Coconuts!

Ben's taking tae kwon do, and he is required to wear a cup.

I asked him what he thought it was for.

"I know already," he said confidently. "It's to protect my bladder."

karrie said...

I would be willing to poop in my pants if doing so resulted in an afternoon nap!

Stepping Over the Junk said...

I used to do obnoxious singing in the car to keep my kids up on the way home for their naptime. And then I started keeping a cold washcloth to put on their faces and legs and wake them up if they drowsed off.

Mimi said...

Robots. Puppies. Check. Man, if Miss Baby takes so much as a protracted BLINK in the car, it's game over for naptime. Whaaaaa? Not fair. I do a pretty good dancing monkey, myself, even though I get dreadfully carsick if I so much as tilt my head funny while in the car. So full on turning around and dancing? Not so good. But nap time!!!! c'mon!

I have a nephew around The Mayor's age: the first time he saw Miss Baby during a diaper change, he expressed with awe: "Look [brother]! She's got TWO peepers."

Indeed.

PunditMom said...

God, I love what kids say!

Cece said...

Did the kids at least drop a dime in your tin cup? lol

Lawyer Mama said...

OH yes, I do this too! Coconuts though - Baaaahaaaaa!

Mel said...

LMAO!!! It's totally genetic. ;)

Aliki2006 said...

Both my kids never slept in the car anyway, so we were always safe...but I feel the pain of a cancelled nap!

Denguy said...

Yes, I remember the song and dance to keep them awake until we got home.

Life As I Know It said...

OMG. This is so true. I try not to be in the car anywhere near naptime because even 5 minutes of sleep is pretty much it for the rest of the day.

Lotta said...

Ha! Now I can't stop thinking of the song, "You put the lime in the coconut".

PS - I'm totally worried that you are ticked that I joined up with that Vote for my blog after your buddy Melanie did.

mel said...

We are past that stage here (The Girl gave up naps at 2!!!! Ack.) but I remember it well. I was almost always the monkey...while The Husband was the one shrieking "Is she awake? Wake her up? Are you watching her? How are her eyes?!?!" Good times.

Abbynormal said...

That's it he's going to be a doctor.

A Citizen said...

Just wait when the naps stop- It's like God pulls the plug on whatever energy you have left-

Enjoy them while they last-

Jay said...

Coconuts?
That gross, in a hilarious-because-it's-not-my-problem kind of way.

Queen of the Mayhem said...

Nothing is worse than a nap cancellation! Oh the carnage when a nap is not fully realized!

After Mr. Mayhem taught Junior the word "balls" to describe the coconut region....he attempts to insert it into EVERY conversation he has! UGH!


PS: I am shocked you had nothing to add to my epic post about the pic Jenn sent us! :)

scribbit said...

Ha! Yea, sometimes I used to reach in the back seat and tickle them unmercifully to keep them away. Loud noises, stereo up, feeding them treats, ANYTHING to keep that precious nap a possibility.

Sometimes the music can backfire and be so loud they shut down and go to sleep in response--like white noise or something. Not good.

homemom3 said...

hehe, sounds like my car. Never, ever let them fall asleep. Mine tend to try any time we drive down the road.

Pendullum said...

I've gotta lovely bunch of coconuts...
Hee they are nicely in a row... Big ones small ones some as big as your head...

Chaos Control said...

Very cute!

There have been times when I've been the only adult in the car with V and my attempts at keeping him from falling asleep have failed, so I've driven around aimlessly with the hope that he would fall in to a deep, deep sleep. One so deep so as not to wake him when we stopped the car.

It's worked maybe twice out of ten or so times I've tried it. Just call me desperate ...

The Sour Kraut said...

If son #1 fell asleep in the car when I was pregnant with our second son, I would just pull over, recline the seat and fall asleep too. It happened almost daily, I swear! Once I awoke to a kid standing next to the car looking in at me-the weird, sleeping lady.

EE said...

LOL...Boy, do I remember those days!!! I remember yelling, "Boo" when I saw those heads a-bobbin'!!!!

kevin said...

Mine is only 11 months but you're right about falling asleep in the car. The entire rest of the day is shot if she dows. I find myself blasting talk radio hoping she'llstay awake until we get home.

Gotta love Tom Shane and that guy from the Mattress Factory. Those two really should hook up.

amyerj said...

1 Minute of Car Sleep = 15 Minutes of Real Sleep

it's a fact... I just wish I had someone to drive my tired ass around for 20 minutes every day

Velma said...

I used to HATE that, but now nobody in the house naps, ever. Including me, darn it.

Bon said...

i hear you on the nap. and the y chromosome.

the coconuts...we still have to work on "mama" first. but give us time.

thanks for the laugh.

Emily Snipes said...

We do the "Hey, look did you see Santa Claus go by!" & "Look @ that dinosaur!"

Chrissy said...

We don't yet have a name for the coconuts - I wonder what we will call them??? It will happen soon, I am sure. Tonight while little man was sitting on the toilet, he was doing quite the inspection of his little man - joy! It's times like these I wonder why my dear husband isn't more involved in toilet training.

Mrs. Chicken said...

what is this "nap" of which you speak?

jen said...

i know this routine very well. i'll climb in the back if i have to and tickle her.

anything to preserve the nap. selfish, selfish woman that i am.

Dorky Dad said...

COCONUTS? Pretty proud of himself, isn't he?

The Wife and I go through the keep-the-kid-from-sleeping-too-early exercises ourselves. "You're going to nap, kid, even if it kills me." And it usually does.

Thank God for modern medicine.

flutter said...

Your children are f'in hilarious. I wonder where they get it from.

Mama's Moon said...

"coconuts", geesh! Gotta love the innocence!! BTW, can we get a video of your cymbal-clapping, singing monkey routine???

urban-urchin said...

I hear you on the no napping in the car- it totally screws with the nap and without the nap the boy isn't human.

Coconuts indeed, I see the overestimating the size of the equipment starts young.

Flawed & Disorderly said...

Ha ha! I do the same thing!!!! Why is it that 8 minutes of sleep in the car can cancel out a 3 hour nap???? I go mental without my time away from them...I mean without them having their much needed rest. I'm so mean that a couple of days ago I rolled down all the windows and froze them out. Woke 'em right up!Hee hee!

Emily said...

Ha! I do the same monkey dance here. The 5 min snooz+no nap is the worst! I have been known to pull over and do a fire drill sometimes just to keep the child awake. Getting her in and out of the car seat is a pain, but anything to keep her awake.

The Holmes said...

I will confess that the wife and I have blasted rock music and screamed along with it to keep the little guy awake to prevent the dreaded car power nap. Good to know we're not alone.